Victoria in Victoria: November 2011

Victoria had this wonderful idea of having a home birth, I didn't think I was cut out for all that yelling and screaming going on at home followed by the blood and gunk on my floors. I loved a clean and tidy home, and wanted to keep it that way. Every night that I was home during 2009 I would watch my favourite television show, Two and a half Men if Victoria was studying. If she did not have her head buried in books, I would spend hours listening to her explaining to me why having a home birth was so important. It did not take long before I was keen on the home birth idea. I soon realised that hospitals are not always the safest or most appropriate place for child birth. I was now looking forward to our own home birth when the time came for us to start our family together.

I was being posted from Western Australia to Victoria as of January 2010. This guaranteed me to two years ashore so we got down to business in anticipation of having a Victorian baby. That part I was not as happy about as being from SA we generally dislike the Vic’s. Victoria researched for a private midwife to assist us for our baby’s birth and found the most wonderful woman, a mother of six plus a foster child too.

At this time in life there was and still is a lot of headaches with in the system in regards to private midwives and home births. This is due to the government and doctors being a pack of vultures wanting a piece of the pie and control over women and their baby’s rights. The paper had a lot of negative stories and a few positive stories on this topic. We were just grateful to all the lovely midwives in Victoria who enjoy helping families bring their children into the world in a safe and happy environment called home.

Each of our appointments with J was in the comfort of her home and was not a short ten or 15 minute meeting like in the hospital system, we were never there for less than two hours per visit. It was relaxing and rewarding for both me and Victoria as I was part of the plan and not just the guy holding his wife’s hand saying breathe baby, breathe. Each meeting we would talk about a different topic in regards to the pregnancy and birth, Victoria’s role, J’s role, the back up midwife A’s role as well as my role.

It was Sunday morning the 29 August when Victoria told me that she had been having contractions for most of the night but did not wake me as I was dead to the world. I was ecstatic that I would soon be a father for the first time, so I took my parents and my mother in law for a short drive and to the shops before sending them on their way to a hotel for a couple of days so that Victoria and I could have the house to ourselves for the birth.

We rang J and informed her that things were happening and ask for guidance, and we were told to continue on as normal until things heated up a bit, so we did. We took our dog Charlie for a walk to the Beach and what an experience, Victoria had to stop every five minutes or so with contractions which made me think that we ought to be getting home ASAP. Later Sunday night we rang J to ask her to come over as we believed the baby was not far away, and both midwives were at our home before midnight ready for Victoria to give birth.

This was not the case as the night was very long and tiring for all especially Victoria who had not slept for quite some time now, nor had I, but I believed that if she is awake then I am awake too as her supporter. Sunday night passed and Monday morning arrived with no real progress towards the birth happening any time soon. I was sure for that for her to be in so much pain that she would be close to birthing the baby, but not to be as time between contractions were varying all the time and by early afternoon Victoria had gone through a lot with no success. She also had two large bulges in her back which were concerning for all. We decided to ring the hospital where we were booked in as a back up and informed them we were on our way.

We arrived at 1500 approximately and were met by a midwife named Bec. We provided her with a copy of our birth plan and explained how we were hoping for it all to work,that Victoria did not want to be offered or given any drugs or gas what so ever either.

A doctor examined Victoria and assessed her as six centimetres dilated, then Bec showed us to our room where she left us for a while. Bec then came back to offer us the birth pool, but told us that we were unable to have a water birth as such due to no qualified water birth midwives being on duty. We were upset at the fact that our baby was not going to be a water baby or a home birth baby. However we did not expect that they would have a birth pool available for us at all. As time passed by in the birth pool, which I was unable to actually hop into with my wife because I only wore jeans and a shirt to the hospital not thinking that we would have the use of a birth pool.

We soon made our way back to the room ready for the final stages of the birth. As the plan was for me to stand behind Victoria and catch our baby I was nervous and excited at the same time. I stood there with such excitement when J said to me that Victoria’s about to have the baby right now. Boy when they say now do they mean now, as I watched in anticipation I could see something funny looking, the skin stretching and what I now know as crowning. The sight of my baby’s head sliding on out as I held my hands in position was amazing, and within seconds out she came.

As soon as I seen that we had a daughter I had tears of pure happiness. As I passed Charlotte through to Victoria I was waiting for a good minute or two before she noticed that we had our beautiful baby girl, Charlotte Rose Morgan. Everything had gone to our birth plan, with the exception of a home water birth. Our baby was born naturally in a nice comfortable environment, with no drugs or equipment what so ever and no doctors at the birth.

It took a few weeks for Victoria to get over the fact that she gave birth in a hospital rather than home, but I reassured her that she done a fantastic job considering the time and pain and nothing went wrong with the birth itself. We could not have wished for better treatment from the hospital, Bec’ was lovely and caring; she left us to do our thing as much as she could.

I would recommend all men who are against home births to listen to your wife/partner and have an understanding what they want. Their mind, body and soul need to be at ease to ensure that your unborn child is at ease too.If they are happy and comfortable then your life and pregnancy will be a happy and comfortable one, I guarantee you. If you find a private midwife who suits your needs and expectations you will be fine.

I have always loved my wife with all my heart, but the love and respect for her that night giving birth will never fade until I die.

Bless him, I do love reading his story. I have a good laugh and tear up a bit every time I read it.

Nom nom nom. We have just returned from five days camping in Berri, a fruit lover's paradise. We worked our way through many kilos of fresh and local apples, mandarins, cherries, apricots, nectarines and pistachios, straight from the the farms. Berri is located in the Riverland in South Australia, where Wayne's father Kim grew up.

Charlotte loved the time outdoors. She was naked 90% of the time, and had lots of practise using the potty. I love camping, the fresh air and stars, the simplicity. This was our first camping trip using cloth nappies. There was a washing machine, and the nappies dried really easily on the washing line. Easy peasy.

Our campsite

At the camping store

We also spent a few days in Adelaide catching up with family. We spent some time with my grand parents and some of Wayne's old friends.

My Granny

My Grandad

I finally had the time to try out a new craftwhile we were away, needle felting. After buying some beautiful roving wool at the Little Yarra Steiner School fair a couple of weeks ago, I found this book at the library